Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
