So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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