I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Randomize
