We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
