I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
