Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
