i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
