Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Quick, to the slutcave!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
