well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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