went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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