k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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