Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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