even my farts smell like vagina
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
she peed on how many people?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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