well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
