I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
