how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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