One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
i think i just lost a toe
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
