i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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