I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
high people should be assigned attendants
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He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
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Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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