I got chris browned last night
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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