a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize