...so i touched it.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
