we're blogging at a bar
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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