I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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