You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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