my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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