Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
