areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize