If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
