Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
