All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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