i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
