I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize
