If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
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i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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