When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize