Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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