Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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