If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
