The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
