When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
