Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
