Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
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