Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
