dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
