She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
