I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
