only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize