I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize