when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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