I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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