Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
